Why I Call Him Yahweh

One thing you will learn about me is I don’t do things because other people do them. Actually, one of my highest values is individuality and going AGAINST the grain, not WITH it. I don’t do things because it’s popular or because it will get clicks. I’m not trying to “build a platform” nor do I compete with other creators. I do not allow that in.

That said, I can always articulate for you WHY I do things the WAY I do them, and it’s never “because she does it” or “because he does it.”

That said, I wanted to share why I starting calling God Yahweh on this channel about a year or more ago, where this started for me and what it means to me.

WHY I CALL HIM YAHWEH.

I was saved and encountered Jesus at the age of 12. I spoke in tongues for the first time at 13 and was filled with the Holy Spirit, but I wasn’t properly taught how to steward that and I was too young to understand it in context, so I ended up abusing it. I eventually stopped speaking in tongues over the years and just forgot about and shelved the gift, not understanding IT WAS A GIFT.

I went to a bible university, graduated, and even led worship at churches, then casually drifted into a life of casual sin and called myself a believer. Still leading worship at churches. Paid staff. Never feeling right about it, but having a major disconnect in understanding the damage I was doing. I had no power, just a “form of godliness”. Oddly enough, God still used me as a worship leader and pastor in my early thirties, and I would know the anointing of God was with me at all times, even in that rebellion. But I still wouldn’t (for years) grasp how much of a protection was on my life. I deserved death for how I was living.

‘They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that! ‘ // 2 Timothy 3:5

No other Christian should’ve even hung out with me, but guess what? Our culture doesn’t understand the seriousness of this scripture. And we definitely don’t obey it. Paul instructed Timothy in this, and it’s found in a section in the bible called “The Dangers of The Last Days.” Imagine that.

Year after year after year, I just kept feeling like something was missing. Like I was living but not alive. Floating along, doing as I pleased. Working. Paying bills. Sexual sin. No filter with music. No filter with TV or movies. No filter with my mouth. I drifted into New Age. I played on the edges. I studied and learned astrology, every tarot card, all the New Age language. I could read an astrological chart like an academic. I became a student of Satan’s world and his word. All while listening to worship music. Yes, it’s as repulsive as it sounds.

Then, my Mom died. The night she was killed and my brother called me crying saying our Mom was dead at 55, I was up watching a tarot card reading. I carried THAT guilt for the next 5 years. Yeah, you have NO IDEA.

I wasn’t where I needed to be, and I knew it. But there was so much mixture I didn’t know how to get back. When the serpent has succeeded to get you so tied up in other belief systems, ways of living, super lax in your values, he’s won you. His job is to twist your world this way, weaving in the title of christian, putting you in a mixture so thick you don’t even see a problem with it.

One night, I finally had the wake-up call and moment I had needed. It came through being so utterly tired and disappointed in a relationship I was in. I was tired of NOT doing it God’s way. My way wasn’t working. I cried all night. I gave my life back to the Lord COMPLETELY, and the next morning, I was not the same. Something had changed in me. I spent the next year cleaning. up. my. life. Clean, clean, clean. Cleanse, cleanse, cleanse. Get rid of. Burn. Stop. Close down. Stop watching. Stop listening. Modify. Pivot.

REPENT.

First it’s a heart change, THEN behavior follows. Otherwise, it’s just lip service. We shouldn’t need to ASK people to change their behaviors. If someone is TRULY in relationship with Yahweh, you will know it by their BEHAVIORS (we call this fruit). I lived in mixture for YEARS. I was the QUEEN of mixture, so I know it when I see it.

You will know them by their fruit. Do men gather grapes from thorn bushes or figs from thistles? // Matthew 7:16

And at 41 years old, I was now in a place with God that felt entirely new, even though I had spent YEARS in the church and years in ministry as a PK and years calling myself a believer. It was only now I was beginning to actually feel like one. Because when you’re 12, you don’t understand the breadth of what you’ve just encountered. At 41, I was seeing “God” in a wholeeeee new way.

When I cleaned my life up, I started this channel and ministry. I began walking in the things I knew God was calling me to.

About 11 months ago, the Lord gave me a word about the East Wind: https://youtu.be/A0G9k4VTe8Q?si=MoVRqP9Yeru2A-Zy

Funny enough, the title of this video is “The Winds of Change”, and that’s exactly what the Lord has been speaking to us about recently. In that video, and as part of the study for it, I learned something about the Hebrew language.

In the Hebrew language, there are actually no vowels. Vowels were added later to make it easier for us to translate the original language of the ancient Israelites, but originally there were only consonants. So, Yahweh is actually written in ancient Hebrew as Yhwh.

Further study revealed that this was tied to the breath of God – the Ruach. This was a natural fit for the video and talking about the Wind of God. I shared how crucial it is we SPEAK to things just like Ezekiel did to the valley of dry bones. (Ezekiel 37)

Then I demonstrated in this video how it’s also been studied and proven that this very name of God – Yhwh or Yah-weh is the breathe out and breathe in that all humanity does all day every day without any second thought.

Yah (Breathe out) and Weh (Breathe in). OR YH (out breath) WH (in breath)

That our very LIVES are in the hand of God at all times. Your next breath has been approved. Let that sink in if you think you’re in control of your own life. 😉

Around this time or shortly thereafter, I was also guided to read 2 books by Michael Heiser, may he rest in peace.

1. Supernatural: https://a.co/d/09fy3Xwu

and

2. The Unseen Realm: https://a.co/d/05gvnHGD

There are a handful or less of books I’ve ever read that, when I closed the last page, my jaw was on the floor, and these would be two of them. Next to the Bible, these 2 books changed everything for me and would ultimately bring me into a very different relationship with who had always felt like a bit of an elusive God.

These books brought the bible to LIFE for me, where I had always found it to be a bit disconnected. I could never really wrap myself around it – only quote it and know what was right and wrong. But it wasn’t ALIVE to me. After I read these books, the entire bible came alive to me like fresh fire and wind in my spirit man. It’s literally like God breathed understanding into my spirit for the first time. I cannot explain it to you. Everything now was in context and made sense in a way I could not verbalize.

NO ONE had ever given me the gospel of Jesus in this way. Thank you, Michael Heiser.

Genesis to Revelation. The brilliance of Yah. I now SAW him and his kingdom for the first time. Like REALLY saw it and understood it cover to cover. And I wanted to KNOW THIS God.

Throughout the books, Heiser so eloquently paints the picture of Yahweh with Israel and takes you on a relationship journey in a way that absolutely transformed me. And it was there I connected for the first time with YAHWEH and not just “God.” There’s this PERSON of “God” that I was seeing for the first time. And I now wanted to call Him by His name – not just call him “God.” 

This was PERSONAL now. This is a covenant. We’re in a relationship FOREVER. This is my home. My origination point.  I’m his girl – now and always.

Every single day since then, it drives me to pursue Him like never before. To build His kingdom and fully understand my role in that. Like Jeremiah said, “It’s like fire shut up in my bones.”

But if I say I’ll never mention the LORD or speak in his name, his word burns in my heart like a fire. It’s like a fire in my bones! I am worn out trying to hold it in! I can’t do it! // Jeremiah 20:9

I still sometimes call Him “God.” But to me, that feels like a name I abused for so long that it doesn’t match the personal relationship I have now.

God = The impersonal, elusive, distant God who I abused for MANY years. Vs…

Yahweh = My Creator and my friend.

He’s Yahweh. Yah, the Most High. His son is Jesus (Yeshua – Hebrew), or even HaMashiach (the Messiah in Hebrew), unique and different from the other “sons of God” we see in Yah’s council and court.

I call him Yahweh, because I KNOW him. And realizing that all those years I called myself a Christian, I didn’t actually didn’t know him. I USED Him. I used his name. Yet, He still chose to use me and work through me even in my filth.

What a disgrace.

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Your story might be like mine or maybe it won’t be. It doesn’t matter what you call Him. I see some people who call Him Abba (Father in Hebrew), and this feels personal for them. That is lovely.

What we call Him is MUCH less important than that we can definitively, without reservation say we are in a solid, PERSONAL relationship with this God who created us. That when he speaks to you, you know. And you know it so well, it’s like a human person you would live with. Familiar. No question. Different and separate from your own thoughts, ideas, opinions. Distinct in tone, language, authority, and power from your own voice. When you hear it, your spirit is compelled to RESPOND. You need to converse, write, create, obey. This is not about puppeteering. Your spirit was created to RESPOND to His. That is how connected we have the capability of being. It’s that intimate. It’s that real.

‘My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one can snatch them away from me, for my Father has given them to me, and he is more powerful than anyone else. No one can snatch them from the Father’s hand. The Father and I are one.” // John 10:27-30

You can call God whatever you want. That is SO not the point. The point is that what you call Him feels personal to you and it means something and isn’t just a label to you. It’s about what the name MEANS to you.

We better be WELL beyond “God first” in a link in bio. Oh, Lord forgive us.

This is why I call him Yah or Yahweh in my videos and have been ever since I read these books. Because things have changed. I understand His kingdom now, and in a way I NEVER did before 41. This year, as I turn 44, I can truly say that the last 4 years have been the most rewarding, fulfilling, joyful, sometimes intense and challenging years in my entire life. I’ve never felt so alive than when I stepped into my calling from Him. It is UNMATCHED territory to know WHO you were created to be and to step into that fully. There’s absolutely NOTHING that can compete with that. No amount of any substance, sexual sin, pleasure, or money can even come CLOSE to Yahweh.

I want to wrap by saying how much I HIGHLY recommend these books. However, PLEASE read Supernatural first before The Unseen Realm. Supernatural is a very thin, easy read. The Unseen Realm is much more exhaustive and long, and you need the foundation of Supernatural before you read The Unseen Realm. And if you only want one recommendation, read Supernatural. You can read it in a weekend.

Love,

T